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I am doing my project on the FBI's Most Wanted aka The Runaway Princesses. I will share the stories of princesses and their criminal records. 

Link to my Storybook


  1. Hi Madison! What a creative idea to turn classic fairy tales like Cinderella into FBI mystery genre stories! I love how you’ve modernized these princess stories here—it drew me into your story and made it seem more relevant, as well as it gave the princesses more agency in their stories. As I understand it, your Storybook so far has almost two Introduction pages to it, which gives me a pretty complete picture of what your project is going to be about: two FBI agents, Blake and Jane, who will be tracking down the missing princesses whose stories are described on the homepage. One thing that I’m a little confused about after finishing the end of the Introduction is what each story will contain, if the premise is that Blake and Jane fall asleep. Are the other pages in your Storybook going to be Blake and Jane dreaming about each of the cases? If so, I wonder if there could be a good way to clue your readers into that direction more, although I don’t know how exactly that could look right now. I also wonder if Blake and Jane will end up solving the case at the conclusion of your website. Perhaps, if they don’t solve the case, these princesses’ stories could turn into urban legend like they currently are? Overall, I’m excited to see where this Storybook goes next!

  2. Hey Madison,
    I absolutely am infatuated with the concept of this project! Where on Earth did you come up with the idea to change Disney princess stories into an FBI investigation of crowned and corseted killers!? The imagination involved in such a drastic scene change is astounding and I am very excited to see where this goes! One question I do have is how you plan on reconciling the magical world with the world of the FBI agents in New York? It seems like these two antithetical planes of existence would require cancellation of the rules or boundaries of the other. For example, how can a crime investigation exist with modern science and forensics when magic and fairies exist and could magic their way out of science? Another question is whether this storybook will focus on the FBI agents or the princesses, as the introduction could lead one to believe either would be the main character while the others are ancillary? I do love the premises fo this story and am very excited to see where it goes this semester, happy writing!

  3. Hello Madison!
    This idea for a storybook was SO CREATIVE! I usually am not good at coming up with abstract stories that are compelling like that but you totally nailed it. I liked how you briefly explained their situations and how that ties to the FBI portion of it all. I do know I get ties (obviously) between like traditional princess stories and a modern kind of world. I wonder if the princesses situations will also be modern or if there will be a mix of both? I think it would make sense for it to be clear that it's all set it up in a modern day presence (if it is) to make it all very interesting, or watch a two worlds collide kind of thing. I think there are so many directions you can take this so it will be so interesting to see in what ways you go and the lengths these princesses take to get their revenge.

  4. Hi, Madison. I agree with all the other comments about the creativity behind your idea. I also like how you're giving all the princesses nicknames. Is that to hint at their humanity and show these aren't the stereotypical Disney princesses?

    In the first paragraph about Anne, you start off talking in the past tense. This is signified by the word "had." Later in the same paragraph you have "but she is unable to conceive children." The "is" in that sentence is present tense. You can do either, but the choice needs to be consistent throughout the rest of the writing. I'm not sure about all the benefits and drawbacks to each tense, but you could think of it this way: past tense is like someone telling their children a bedtime story whereas present tense makes the reader feel like they're living what they're reading. Up to you, of course. There are present tense versus past tense decisions to made elsewhere in your introduction, too. Once you decide on which, you can change the rest.

    In the Cinderella paragraph you originally say stepmother and daughter, but then you say Cinderella was treated unfairly by her stepmother and stepsisters. That's an easy fix.

    In the paragraph about Clarissa, you have "These princesses have become the FBI's most wanted." It's unclear to me whether you're talking about the princesses who go under the bed, or all the princesses you've mentioned. I think setting off this sentence in a paragraph of its own and having more explanation will solve this problem for me. You may have another way of doing this. Or maybe I'm misinterpreting, and your current sentence is just fine.

    I'm sorry if it seems like I have a lot of criticism. I always tell my girlfriend you don't want your message to be ruined by how it's delivered, so that's why I've always been so big on grammar and everything. I think you have a great start. Good luck, Madision.

  5. Hi Madison!
    I am so excited about your story book. It has such a fun point of view coming from the perspective of the FBI agents working to find the princesses. I was left wanting more after reading your introduction!
    Has Cinderella already gotten her revenge I am assuming? Are you going to outline the specific crimes committed in the stories? These are details I would love to see once you write your stories! I also am excited that you included Cinderella, probably the most known princess, as well as Clara and Anne who I do not believe I am familiar with. When you write Anne's story, will you include a description of what a Cooper is? I am not sure that I am familiar with that position.
    I can't wait to read your stories and find out what the FBI agents saw in their dreams. It is a really fun topics and I am excited to see what you do with it over the rest of the semester.

  6. Hi Madison!
    The first thing that drew me into your story was the name of it because Princess stories have always intrigued me. I absolutely love how you decided to take princess stories and make them into crime stories with them being the FBI's most wanted. I am always watching crime shows and am very interested to see how your storybook will progress throughout the rest of the semester. I am also wondering if the rest of the stories will be actually stories of the princesses being looked for or will they just be the dreams of the two FBI agents? Both will be an interesting take but the introduction makes me think it will just be dreams and not actual stories of the princesses. I am also wondering if you will be telling stories of what exactly the princess did to make them be on the most wanted list?

  7. Hi Madison! The title made me think of a barbie movie that was about princesses who ran away that I watched when I was younger, but never in a million years would I have thought that the FBI would be involved in your story! This was a neat spin for sure! You seem to combine fairytale and real life with the princess and the FBI. Now will your story continue and be about Blake and Jane building on the case? Will they ever catch the princesses? I am a little unclear on why these princesses would be on the top of the list for the FBI. What could they have done to be so wanted? I also think there is a difficult parallel to bridge between this fairytale type idea of the princesses and the realistic one with the actual FBI, but I am confident that the more you add to your story that it will all become clear! Keep building!

  8. Hi Madison! I just read your project introduction and first story!

    I must first say that this is such a fun topic! Taking princesses and putting them on the FBI's most wanted list is so different from most of what is out their about princesses and I think the choice of going intentionally against this trope will make for an interesting storybook for sure! I also like how you take the introduction to not only introduce the three princesses of your project, but also the agents that will be investigating them! It makes both sets of characters seem equally as important!

    As for Anne's story, there is one thing I am a bit confused about, which is the timeline. You start out the story in the doctor's office where they find out Anne cannot have children. Later, when talking about her father's sickness, you say "The issue is that Anne’s father already has heart disease." and say "Ever since" and give an explanation that indicates to me that this heart disease was brought on by Anne's inability to have children, saying "Anne’s father ended up getting diagnosed with heart failure and doesn’t have that long to live." which contradicts that first part of the sentence. Did he get the heart disease before or after he found out about Anne's inability to have children? It might be helpful to add a bit more to clear up the timeline in that paragraph!

    OMG that ending! What a twist, when I read your introduction I figured the princesses would be fully guilty of their crimes, but Anne and Richard are completely oblivious and it was actually her father that committed the crime. Very interesting touch. I am excited to read more of your stories!

  9. Hi Madison!
    The topic you've chosen to pursue for your storybook is so interesting and unique to me! Usually when I think of a princess, I think of a pure and blameless person who is super sweet and wouldn't even hurt a fly. Your storybook changes that perspective in a cool way! I appreciated how into detail you went in your introduction by not only explaining each of the princesses but also the FBI agents that will be featured throughout your stories.
    For your first story, I know you wanted to make it more modern, but I think having a king and servants makes it still kind of seem in the past. Maybe changing their roles to be more modern would help if fit into the time you're going for! I'd also love to hear how or why the FBI was put on the case and how they tracked Anna down to make her the most wanted. Other than that, I think your story was good and I love the direction you took overall! Best of luck!

  10. Hi Madison!
    I love the theme of your page and project. The FBI take with princesses is a really cool spin! I also like how you made the Anne's story so modern - even with the king having heart disease (and knowing about it!).That is not usually included in older, more traditional versions of the story, and it was fun to read. Using dialogue around the king planning to steal a baby was a really good move because it helped the reader engage more. I would love to see the suspense grow even more there - I mean stealing a baby?! That's not something you see in most of these stories! Also, it's so interesting how the king is getting nervous because the FBI is seeking him out. Usually a king is all-powerful and fears no one. That could be an interesting theme to play with a flesh out a little - who is the top dog here? And why? Great story!! It was really fun to read :)

  11. Hi Madison!

    What a cool storybook idea.. FBI's Most Wanted: Princess Edition. Haha. I really like how you introduced everyone in the introduction page, giving a quick background for each of them. I was a little confused when it was about the FBI agents and the missing princesses. Were the missing princesses only the twelve dancing ones? Or all of them? It sounded like it was only about the dancing ones so it made me wonder how Anne and Ella were involved. Honestly I think just playing around with the order of the paragraphs would help with that. Maybe if you introduced the FBI agents first, then followed with the same order of the princesses as if they were looking over case files?
    I liked your story about Anne. Have you ever read Palace of Mirrors? The whole adoption thing really reminds me of that childhood favorite book :-) I cannot wait to read your other stories!

  12. Hi Madison!
    I like the mix of princesses and agents, it's a mix you don't get to see too often. Your intro reads like the summaries you would find on the back of books. It hooks you and makes you want to read further. The fact that all these princesses committed crimes on the same day is strange, is it perhaps a conspiracy? The dream aspect is really cool, alluding to some sort of prophetic dream. Poor Anne! Her dad stole a baby yet she is the one who is most wanted. I'm sure it'll be devastating when she figures out her baby was stolen away from his original mother. And the same fate for Ella! Both these girls are wanted for crimes that they didn't commit. I wonder if these princesses are on the same island somehow, or if they are on islands nearby each other. Also, Louis' basement sounds a bit creepy to me! Surely they would have investigated their house? Maybe they found that room and believed it was Ella's. Looking forward to the last installment and seeing if the agents are successful!

  13. Hi Madison,
    The images of the princesses are fun, but I have a lot of questions about the worldbuilding. Why are there so many kings and princesses in New York? Is that part a dream? You mention the princesses before the agents fall asleep, so it is unclear what is a dream and what is real. Another thing, in the Ella story, what poison did they use? Do the agents know the cause of death? Some poisons do not show up under a standard toxicology report. Also, it could be interesting to go into the symptoms of the poisoning. The agents seem like they are going to be the main characters in the introduction, but they are barely in the princess stories. Is the investigation meant to be the focus, or is it a plot device to connect the stories? Why are the princesses the prime suspects? The Ella story has evidence found at the scene, but its circumstantial and would not be enough for a conviction. Anne has a motive, but why is she suspected over her husband or father? You have a good concept, but I must admit it confuses me.

  14. Hi Madison!
    I love how much dialogue is in your story. I imagine that takes a long time to write, but it makes the story seem more like a reality which I enjoyed. I did get a little confused a couple times due to the sentence structure. When the lights flicker on to reveal the secret room, I first thought that those were the lights in Ella's room. A descriptive sentence might add some clarity for the reader here. I read it a second time and understood, so that totally could've been my fault. Why is the FBI chasing after Ella? Why wouldn't they believe it was the father? Does Ella know that her husband and father were actually the reason they died? Also, if the poison was so successful on the stepmother and stepdaughter, why didn't it work previously when they tried to poison the husband?These were a couple questions I left with, but I actually kind of like how it is a cliff hanger. Great job!

  15. Hi Madison,

    First of all your concept made me gasp out loud and then read the tagline to my friend. I got so excited it just sounded so fun! I am not completely sure why the stories are connected exactly but I don't mind! I think the stories are so different and the dialogue helps us as readers imagine what your stories are trying to say! I think it is really cool how you have left uses the audience on a cliff hanger. I think it is cool that you have meshed the storybook of fairytales with princesses and FBI most wanted storylines. This makes me wonder if it is just a passion of yours? What is it that made you want to pursue the unique storyline and plot. Overall I liked how you have these characters a visual aspect, but I also wish you would've added more photos too!


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